The Wedding Kiss: The First Expression of Married Intimacy

Real talk family. Remember watching the wedding ceremony to the part where the vows have been spoken and the husband is given permission to kiss his bride. Often, the wedding kiss is a special, romantic conclusion to the ceremony. The couple leans toward one another, shares a kiss, and guests erupt in celebration. What I consider so profound about the wedding kiss is that the kissis the beginning of intimacy within the covenant.

The romantic wedding kiss we recognize today developed through a variety of cultural and religious traditions rather than coming from one single origin. Kissing has been part of human relationships for thousands of years with varied meanings. Historical accounts describe a kiss as being associated with the sealing of a marriage agreement, even arranged marriages.

The Bible isn't afraid of romantic love. This may be one of the most beautiful discoveries couples can make when studying Scripture. The Bible doesn't treat marital affection as something embarrassing or something Christians need to avoid talking about. In fact, Song of Songs celebrates romantic attraction, desire, beauty, affection, and intimacy between a man and a woman. The book begins with the bride expressing romantic desire "Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth, for your love is more delightful than wine." (Song of Songs 1:2; NIV). This is important as we recognize the wedding kiss as the first expression of covenant intimacy. At times it feels as though we as Christian couples receive plenty of teaching about commitment, responsibility, sacrifice, and service but not enough encouragement to celebrate affection within marriage. Covenant intimacy and physical affection is remarkably beautiful.This is a message I especially want Covenant Strong to continue communicating. Marriage doesn't require Christian couples to be ashamed of passion. God created marital intimacy. The covenant provides a committed relationship in which husband and wife can explore affection, desire, pleasure, vulnerability, and physical intimacy without carrying unnecessary shame or guilt about the fact that they are attracted to one another.

Wedding Tradition Fact
The wedding kiss is one of the most memorable moments of the ceremony that is photographed and included in the photo album or wedding video.

Reflection Tip
Some couples remember their first kiss as husband and wife forever but years later, they barely kiss anymore. Many couples blame business, work life, children, and stress as reasons kissing becomes more of a memory than a habit. But there are simple actions couples can take to enjoy the intimacy of kissing. Start with the simple, common ritual of kissing when you leave and return from home as well as before going to sleep. Don't make affection mechanical. Pause, look at your spouse, and be present. Let the gesture communicate affection rather than simply checking a box. Before long, affection becomes another thing you do. In fact, as you incorporate affection into your day to day, it becomes more meaningful as your marriage grows.

Tonight, sit close to your spouse. Put your phones away, look at each other to each answer the following question: "What is one thing we could do to bring more romance into our marriage?"

Prayer for Couples: Heavenly Father, Thank You for creating marriage as a covenant where love, friendship, affection, companionship, and intimacy can flourish. Help us never become so busy that we stop noticing one another. Teach us to be affectionate, attentive, playful, patient, and present. Where our connection has grown distant, help us find our way back to one another. Where stress has interrupted our intimacy, give us patience. Where insecurity has made affection difficult, give us grace. Help us honor our bodies, our marriage, and the gift of intimacy You have entrusted to us. Keep romance alive in our relationship—not simply as a feeling, but as an intentional expression of love and commitment. Help us remember that the deepest intimacy isn't simply being physically close. It is being known, safe, cherished, and chosen. In Jesus' name, Amen.

Wedding traditions may last for a day, but the covenant they represent is meant to shape a lifetime.